Just a quick preview of the two teaser trailers for the upcoming 24th James Bond adventure, SPECTRE. The film is due to be released in the U.S. in November, and a week later in the rest of the world.
SPECTRE co-stars Lea Seydoux, Christoph Waltz, Dave Bautista, and the lovely Italian siren Monica Belluci making history as the oldest Bond Lady at 50. You wouldn't know it to look at her, though. Go, Monica...
Series regulars Ralph Fiennes, Naomi Harris, Ben Whishaw, and Rory Kinnear make welcome returns, as well, supporting our boy 007.
Hello, folks... With the posting of our last Spring 2015 Movie Review, THE AGE OF ADALINE, we will begin adding our Summer 2015 flicks. Please expect the first batch of those to post by next weekend. Those include: AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON, TOMORROWLAND, MAD MAX: FURY ROAD, SAN ANDREAS, ALOHA, JURASSIC WORLD, TED 2, and SPY.
THE AGE OF ADALINE (2015 - ROMANCE / DRAMA) ***1/2 out of ***** OR 7 out of 10 (Adaline, girl, just own it already...)
CAST: Blake Lively, Michiel Huisman, Harrison Ford, Kathy Baker, Ellen Burstyn, Amanda Crew, Anthony Ingruber. DIRECTOR: Lee Toland Krieger (WARNING: Some SPOILERS and the biggest non-issue ever in the History of Science and The World - straight ahead)
IT'S LIKE THIS: Recently, we reviewed three films that are prime examples of what we like to call the "What-Exactly-Is-The-Fucking-Problem-Here? Movie". Essentially, these films pivot around protagonists who whine and cry and act like they have problems - when in reality they should be thanking their lucky stars for the windfalls that have come their way. First we had THE BOY NEXT DOOR (review # 602), wherein cougar lady Claire Petersen (Jennifer Lopez) hemmed and hawed because of her one-night-stand with the 19-year old hottie (Ryan Guzman) living next door, leading to some unnecessary drama when she dumped him instead of, you know, continuing to milk his nutsac. Then we had INDECENT PROPOSAL (review #603) wherein a lovely L.A. couple that looks like Demi Moore and Woodly Harrelson found themselves in dire financial straits - only to be offered $1,000,000 by a studly billionaire who looks like Robert Redford, for one night with the wife. Unbelievably, it took our lovely couple a whole agonizing 8 hours to think it over. With that many zeros, I would have screamed "Hell, yes sir!!!!!" in two seconds. Then we had FIFTY SHADES OF GREY (review # 604), where we watched as mousy, shy English Literature major Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) entered into a steamy, cat-and-mouse affair with the mysterious and seriously hot billionaire tycoon, Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). Unfortunately, Anastasia found out that Christian was into more than just some light petting when it comes to foreplay - and wasn't sure if she should continue banging him. Basically, any reasonable person's reaction to THE BOY NEXT DOOR, INDECENT PROPOSAL, and FIFTY SHADES OF GREY would be somewhere along the lines of "What. Exactly. Is. The. Fucking. Problem. Here?" We had a bit of break from "What Exactly Is The Fucking Problem Here" movies for awhile, but now we're back smack dab in the middle of another one. Our next review is THE AGE OF ADALINE, and it's about a lovely blonde chick named Adaline Bowman (Blake Lively) who was born in, like, 1900 or something. She was struck by lightning while submerged in a frozen Northern California creek in the middle of Christmas (I beg of you, don't ask) in 1925 which led to her... never aging again a single day and living forever and always looking like she's 25. Basically, because of that lightning strike Adaline will eternally and perpetually resemble Blake Lively in her luscious prime - forever and ever and ever - and never ever ever die. Do you see where I am going with this, folks? If not, let me spell it out for you: "What. Exactly. Is. The. Fucking. Problem. Here?" That's right. Most of us would kill to have this "problem". Not our Adaline, though, who in the movie's most unbelievable scene is concerned and disturbed when a traffic cop questions why her driver's license says she's 45 but she still looks like Blake Lively in her luscious prime. He confiscates her driver's license and tells her to go to the police precinct the next day with her birth certificate to prove she really is who she says she is and is still smokin' hot at the age of 45. Hilariously, Adaline's reaction is to go home, pack her bags, say goodbye to her family, move to another state, and change her goddamn identity. I swear I turned to my buddy and asked: "What the hell is she doing?" Folks, I not only would've shown up the next day at the police precinct with my birth certificate, but I would have also invited all my family, friends, and called a press conference with the national and international media - to show the world that, yes, I'm still hot at 45 and could pass for twenty years younger. Adaline, however, seems to think that being agelessly gorgeous is a bad thing. Oh, whatever. Anyhow, so begins Adaline's many years and decades of moving from place to place, changing her identity as she goes, never staying in one city for too long, running away anytime anybody gets too close to her - apparently lest anyone realize that she's, well, immortal. I'm sorry but couldn't she just fucking tell them, I don't know, that Clinique really, really, REALLY works for her? Hell, maybe she could be a spokesmodel for a skin care company and profit from her freak-of-nature status. What the fuck is the problem here? Ay, madre de dios, Adaline... Hell, even her daughter Flemming (Ellen Burstyn) tells Adaline to just kick up her heels and relax already. It's also my sad duty to report that Flemming apparently didn't inherit Adaline's ability to stay young forever. Nope, she's basically going to age like the rest of us and get more and more wrinkly as time goes on - unlike her mom who looks she just got done feasting on the blood of an entire village of virgins. But, hey, whatever it takes to keep getting carded at clubs and bars, I guess. You see, Adaline's desire is to grow old with someone. "Without that, love is just heartbreak..." she touchingly tells Flemming at one point. To which I gently responded, "Horseshit - just pretend to be his trophy wife when he starts to go bald and blind." Why is it that the ability to stay young forever is gifted to someone who doesn't have the first fucking clue what to do with it? And not to someone like me or Paris Hilton or the Guidos of the Jersey Shore who would have some very definite ideas of how we would run with that shit? But I digress. At any rate, Adaline makes it to 2015, still looking as hot and fuckable as Blake Lively in her luscious prime. Continually watching her family and friends wither up like prunes under the summer sun, while she herself remains a plump and moist as, well, Blake Lively in her luscious prime. Boo hoo. Too bad so sad. Cry me a river. To be fair, though, Adaline seems to take this all quite well. That is, until one day she meets a hot bearded architect named Ellis Jones (Michiel Huisman) who from the first moment he lays eyes on Adaline, makes it clear that he wants to be her Dad-deh. Oh, sure... Adaline plays hard-to-get for awhile, but eventually it becomes clear that she does want her ass spanked by Ellis and agrees to date him. This eventually leads to Adaline accompanying Ellis to meet his parents. Which, for Adaline, is some serious shit. Think about it: she's actually at least 50 years older than Ellis' parents. How's that for a mindfuck. Things get even more hilarious when it turns out (and I swear I'm not making this up) that Ellis's dad, William (Harrison Ford), used to fuck Adaline when he was in his twenties in Europe. "You look EXACTLY like this old friend of mine! We were VERY CLOSE!" William breathlessly tells Adaline in the presence of his wife, Kathy (Kathy Baker), whose expression clearly says "I bet the bitch was more than just an old friend..." Hmmmmm, I have a feeling someone's going to be sleeping on the couch tonight. Adaline covers up by saying that she is the, um, daughter of the woman who William fucked in his twenties. Probably a lot safer than saying that she's, well, actually the woman he fucked in his twenties - and she stayed young and he grew up to be wrinkled but still kind of hot Harrison Ford. Not with Kathy standing right there, shooting daggers from her eyes and breathing hotly through her nose. Oh, what a tangled web we weave, eh, Adaline? So... how will this mindfuck of a soap opera end? Will Adaline 'fess up and tell Ellis her secret? Will she reveal to William that she is actually the girl he fell in love with in his twenties? Or will Adaline do what she has done well for the last century: run away when someone gets too close to her heart? Adaline, dear... some advice: burn your running shoes and stand by your man. You'll thank me later.... BUT SERIOUSLY: In May, two films with the word "Age" in their titles were released within a week of one another. The first is the ultra-high-budget Event Film AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON, which is sequel to the equally big-budget Event Film from two years ago, THE AVENGERS. The second film is our next review, THE AGE OF ADALINE. These two films couldn't be more different from each other. AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON is a full-blooded SuperHero Movie, the kind of blockbuster film meant for summer and big crowds. THE AGE OF ADALINE, on the other hand, probably has only a fraction of AGE OF ULTRON's budget, is a character-oriented love story, and definitely not a SuperHero Movie - although its protagonist does have a special power: the ability to stay young forever. In this respect, the film has some similarities to the THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON, which also deals with someone who is not aging normally in low-key manner. Blake Lively brings the right amount of winsome melancholy and cool resilience to the central role of Adaline Bowman and holds her own against more experienced co-stars like Ellen Burstyn, Harrison Ford, and Kathy Baker, who deliver strong work here. It's important that whoever plays Adaline can be "timeless" and not too much of the modern era, even when she's surrounded by cars and IPhones. Lively effectively conveys Adaline's "old soul" quality through small inflections of voice, expression, and movement, making her always seem like a fish out of water. She makes a tricky role work, and even though the film is more of a love story than an actual character study, she makes us care about Adaline and her plight. Michiel Huisman is a nice, unexpected presence as Ellis, the man who finally makes Adaline choose between running and staying. Huisman was similarly engaging in his much smaller role as a soldier in WORLD WAR Z, and it's nice to see him get a larger-sized role as the male lead this time. Then there's Anthony Ingruber who resembles Harrison Ford to such a remarkable extent that he was sought out to star in this film to play the younger version of Ford's character. Ingruber reportedly got his start posting Han Solo and Indiana Jones impersonations on YouTube. It's also nice to see him finally get his due. Let's hope this leads to other work for Ingruber. To sum up, THE AGE OF ADALINE is a film whose modest success at the box office recently is a nice reminder that films don't have to have mega-budgets and spandex-clad superheroes to draw audiences to the box-office. Sometimes, you just want to take a break from all the explosions and special effects - and get lost in a good old-fashioned love story, which is what the excellent trailer promises and the actual film delivers.
CINDERELLA (2015 - FAMILY / ROMANCE) *** out of ***** OR 6 out of 10 (If I had to wear those glass heels, I would jump off a bridge...)
CAST: Lily James, Richard Madden, Cate Blanchett, Helena Bonham Carter, Hayley Atwell, Sophie McShera, Holliday Grainger, Nonso Anonzie, Stellan Skarsgaard, Ben Chaplin, Derek Jacobie. DIRECTOR: Kenneth Branagh (WARNING: Some SPOILERS and some rather uncomfortable footwear - straight ahead....)
IT'S LIKE THIS: Ah, SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE... Is there a shittier romantic comedy out there? Oh, sure, there probably are ones that are technically worse. But none of them got the big-budget, glossy Hollywood treatment that this movie did, became an inexplicable box-office hit, and still somehow remains a truly crappy and stupid film. Too bad, too, because the premise of a heartbroken Baltimore widower pouring his heart out on a national radio show, and being overheard by an adrift Seattle woman - and suddenly feeling in her heart that he is her soulmate and seeking him out against her better judgement - is a promising premise. It's the execution that fucking sucked. Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan feel like Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan saying lines and mugging shamelessly for the camera - without registering even a single authentic moment, individually or between them. Nora Ephron's writing and directing feels smug and calculated. And worse: Ryan's kooky, ditzy, highly ill-advised performance makes her character feel more like a creepy, scary, shallow stalker and less like a confused intelligent woman who doesn't understand what she's feeling but knows she must do something ASAP - or risk losing something great. All in all, in my opinion, despite its commercial success, SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE was a major bust. Too bad, because a different director with a more no-nonsense sensibility, and leads who were interested in actually "acting" and playing full-blooded human beings might have turned the movie into something worthwhile that actually deserved success. Basically, both Ephron and Ryan had a lot of 'Cinderella' on the brain. Which brings us to our next review... Ah, Cinderella... is there a more egregious fairy tale out there designed to fool little girls into thinking someday their prince will come? Not really. Don't get me wrong: I'm no cynic and I actually do believe in soulmates. But I am also a pragmatic realist. As I told a friend, in this world there are two kinds of people: (1) people you are compatible with; and (2) people you are not compatible with. Within each of those two groups, you will find varying degrees of compatibility and incompatibility. The ones that rank the highest in each group is (1) your true soulmate; and (2) your worst enemy. The issue is this: the chances that you will meet that person (or persons) who is (are) the most compatible with you is like winning the lottery. If you're lucky, you will encounter someone who is, like, number 1,256 on the compatibility list - meaning you get along reasonably well and like the same things and can be around each other without eventually plotting the other's death. The fact of the matter is, the chances of meeting the number 1 person on the compatibility list (or even anyone in the Top 100) are astronomical. Truth is, your true soulmate may be a goat-herder in Nepal or a corporate executive in Shanghai or a lounge singer in Karachi - someone you will likely never cross paths with. Ever. The fact is, most people will settle for someone in the, oh, Top 5000. Which, given how many people there are in the world, isn't really bad. Hell, if you're ending up with someone in the top 1,000,000 you're probably doing okay. Bottom line: the chances that your number 1 compatible person is your next door neighbor or someone who works a few floors down from you or rides the same bus to work every day is a bazillion-gazillion-kazillion to one. In short, most people settle for someone who is SOMEWHERE on their compatibility list - but very few actually find THE NUMBER ONE. Nope, I believe soulmates do exist. The problem is how Cinderella and other fairy tales condition kids to think they will actually meet them. Sorry to say, but your kiddies are going to have settle for some runner-ups - just like you did. Just keeping it real. And even that's not bad, so don't worry. Just have fun and wish your Nepalese goat-herder or Chinese corporate executive or Karachian lounge singer well - and live your lives. Just don't let your kids buy into the fairy tale bullshit. Which brings us to CINDERELLA, which is like SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE but a lot more tolerable because everyone is actually being sincere and dedicated instead of stupid and ditzy like in that other movie. You know the drill: Cinderella (Lily James) is orphaned and her Pops (Ben Chaplin) marries a conniving bitch (Cate Blanchett) with two daughters who are basically conniving-bitches-in-training (Sophie McShera, Holliday Grainger). Pops suddenly dies (oh, poo) and Connving Bitch Stepmother basically turns Cinderella into a slave for her and her two venomous offspring. Oh, yeah, and there's a prince who is supposed to be Cinderella's number one True Soulmate. How convenient (and unbelievable) that Prince Charming (Richard Madden) just happens to live next door. And how unfortunate that he goes around wearing tight white pants and thigh-high boots. If I were Cinderella, I would confirm that he's not actually a princess. I've seen Pride Parade dancers in manlier clothing. Meow. Oh, and there's also some big ball that Cinderella wants to go to, but obviously doesn't have the wardrobe for. Something her Conniving Bitch Stepmother so sweetly points out. Fortunately, Cinderella's kindness to the rodents that live in her attic (don't ask) pays off and is rewarded with a visit from her Fairy Godmother (Helena Bonham-Carter) - who basically gives her a PRETTY WOMAN-style makeover and sends her off to the ball to stir some shit up. One thing that Cinderella definitely stirs up is a boner from Prince Charming himself. Which, given his campy circus showgirl attire earlier, is a bit of a surprise to me. Maybe he's turned on by her evening gown and glass high heel shoes. Anyway, they have a blast dancing despite Prince Charming still wearing those tight white leggings and thigh-high dominatrix boots and Cinderella wearing an Atlantic Ocean of blue taffeta. But, as with all awesome evenings, this one too comes to an end - and Cinderella runs off into the night. Leaving - you guessed it - a glass high heel shoe that looks like the textbook definition of foot torture. Determined to find the other glass high heel shoe (so he can presumably wear them to go clubbing) Prince Charming orders a search of the entire kingdom to find Cinderella. Of course, it's distinctly possible that Prince Charming actually wants Cinderella and not her other glass shoe. But come on - would you get a load of those skintight pants? Even RuPaul would give it a second thought. So... will Prince Charming find Cinderella and the other shoe? Or will Conniving Bitch Stepmother and her two daughters fuck everything up? What will these hos do to make Prince Charming their own? Should they maybe hold out for someone with more testosterone in his nutsac? Does Prince Charming even have a nutsac? Five words: just look at those pants... BUT SERIOUSLY: A faithful retelling of the Cinderella fairy tale, CINDERELLA has just enough charm, humor, and spectacle to rate above the average mark. Director Kenneth Branagh's work is competent if not especially noteworthy, and the cast is uniformly solid. As with Branagh's direction, they hit all their required marks, only occasionally giving something extraordinary. Lily James is okay as Cinderella, and brings the same sweetness and presence she had in DOWNTON ABBEY. Unfortunately, she isn't really given much to do with the character beyond smile and be kind and occasionally cry. Then again, Cinderella (as with most other fairy tale heroines) doesn't really have much depth to her. It would've been nice, though, for the script to have built in other layers for James to play. This is the case with the terrific Cate Blanchett as Cinderella's wicked stepmother. There are some nice moments wherein Blanchett is allowed to express some nuances through expressions and glances alone. An example is the scene wherein her character overhears Cinderella's father telling his daughter than he will love no one more than her. The way Blanchett plays her character's hurt non-verbal reaction to this is touching. The same is true of the final confrontation between Cinderella and her stepmother. Both James and Blanchett do themselves proud in this subtle scene. Unfortunately, there aren't many other moments where these actresses are given a chance to do something unexpected. Then again, as mentioned above, this may due to the inherent limitations of the fairy tale format. The best moment in the film, though, is the scene where Prince Charming's father (Derek Jacobi) dies - and the Prince say goodbye to him. The shot of the prince lying next to the dying King, curled up like a little boy while clasping his hand, is heartbreaking. Indeed, all of the most powerful scenes in this film are the ones played only with gestures, actions, and expressions. Had there been more of these, the film would've rated higher than above average. All in all, though, CINDERELLA is a reasonably enjoyable family film that send a good message about courage and kindness to the kiddies. It manages to add some nice touches to the familiar story without radically changing it - although the filmmakers could have had a bit more fun with the formula. Still, it's definitely worth a look.
(WARNING: Some SPOILERS and lots of reasons to do a complete background check on potential one-night stands - straight ahead)
IT'S LIKE THIS: It's common knowledge that in the Horror Genre if you have sex, you will die. And die horribly. In movies like FRIDAY THE 13TH, HALLOWEEN, MY BLOODY VALENTINE, THE BURNING, TERROR TRAIN, CURTAINS, PROM NIGHT, and so many more, the randy horndogs were the first ones to meet up with the business end of the killer's weapon. Meanwhile, their more reserved and celibate pals usually either got killed off much later or outright survived. Not fair. As a randy horndog myself, I call 'bullshit!'. Why should I and my fellow degenerates have to die early just because we have healthy libidos? Why should the boring virgins be the ones to make it out alive every single time?
Whatever. Anyway, more of that same unfairness continues with our latest review, the much-acclaimed horror flick IT FOLLOWS. And in case you're wondering what this movie is about, or what "IT" actually is, let me just say that it's kind of like a cross between that creepy ghost girl from THE RING and a searing case of Gonorrhea. And when I say that the protagonist of the movie is fucked, I mean that both literally and figuratively.
She is the lovely virgin, Jay (Maika Monroe). Jay is your average, sweet blonde 16-year old who spends her days running around with her pals and wondering when she will get her cherry popped. Before we answer that last question, let's meet her buddies first. Quite honestly, these assholes are a bit interchangeable, but I'll try to differentiate their personalities as much as I can. Let's see... first, there's Paul (Keir Gilchrist), who's kind of nerdy and sweet and would love to pop Jay's cherry. Then there's Greg (Daniel Zovatto), who's also kind of sweet but less nerdy because he has long "bad boy" hair and would also love to pop Jay's cherry.
At least Jay's guy friends are somewhat easy to tell apart (nerd, bad boy). Her gal pals are not quite as easily distinguished. They are Kelly (Lilly Sepe), who I guess is her sister and is kind of just there. Then there's Yera (Olivia Luccardi), who is I guess is not Jay's sister but more of a friend but I could be wrong because quite frankly Kelly and Yera kind of look and talk alike. Oh, and one of them is constantly playing some sort of clamshell video game like one of those early Nintendo Game & Watches that were the rage in the 80s and are now worth more as much as a PS3 console. But I can't remember who. Quite honestly, these bitches just blend into one in my mind.
But I digress. At any rate, as mentioned before, Jay is busy hanging out with Paul, Greg, Yera, and Kelly - and wondering whether she should give it up to either Paul or Greg. Hmmmm... decisions, decisions. Fortunately, someone else enters the "Virginity Sweepstakes" in the form of Hugh (Jake Weary). Essentially, he does a double cock-block and steals Jay right from under the noses of Paul and Greg, fucks the living shit out of her in his car in some isolated country lane. And they all lived happily ever after.
Well, not really.
You see, not long after playing "stuff the cootch" with Jay, Hugh turns out to have an agenda. A really fucked-up one. Instead of doing some post-fuckie-fuck cuddling and spooning in his car, he basically straps her to a chair and tells her the following: (1) by fucking Jay, Hugh has passed on a "curse" to her; (2) she can only break the "curse" by fucking someone else and passing it on to them; (3) if she doesn't pass the "curse" to someone else by fucking them, an evil spirit whom we will just call "It" will follow her wherever she goes and take on the form of anyone it wants until it catches and kills her, and (4) it's generally looking like she should've just given up her cherry to either Paul of Greg instead. Oh, and top of that, Hugh literally drops off Jay at her house - as in, kicks her out of his car onto the lawn (in her bra and panties) and drives away. She must not have been that great of a lay, after all.
And how was your first time?
Anyway, sure enough, Jay notices strange people, um, following her. Never the same person twice. Always someone new. Never running. Always just... walking... very... slowly... right... towards... her. Seems Hugh wasn't fucking around. Seems like Jay is now the target of whatever fucked-up shite Hugh was running from. And she's next.
So... how will Jay deal with this, uh, "paranormal STD" that she has? Will she take Hugh's advice and fuck someone else to make it their problem? Or will she attempt to trace the curse to its source and try to stop it for good? How will Paul, Greg, Yera, and Kelly help? What happens when they track down Hugh? What can he tell them about the curse? And will Jay cut his cock off for fucking her over - both literally and figuratively?
I would. Then I'd make him eat it with a hotdog bun and some mustard and sauerkraut. Take that, asshole.
BUT SERIOUSLY: One of the most exciting horror releases in the last few years is our latest review, IT FOLLOWS. Filmed on a very low budget (just over a million, I heard), the movie has become an early 2015 word-of-mouth hit and surprise success, grossing nearly $15 million at the North American box office. Eschewing explicit gore and bloody effects, IT FOLLOWS instead relies on slow-burning dread, supremely creepy atmosphere, and a choking sense of impending doom. This film harkens back to such early classics as ROSEMARY'S BABY, ALIEN, INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS, and, especially, HALLOWEEN in its gradual, eerie build-up to a terrifying conclusion.
IT FOLLOWS has many similarities to HALLOWEEN. Both are films centered on suburban teens who are unaware or don't understand the threat slowly growing in their midst. Like John Carpenter, director David Robert Mitchell makes masterful use of anamorphic widescreen shots and negative space to bring threatening elements into seemingly peaceful situations. As with HALLOWEEN, sinister images appear without warning in the background, catching you off guard after a heretofore benign set-up. This quality also appeared in Carpenter's other films like THE FOG (my favorite horror film), THE THING, CHRISTINE, PRINCE OF DARKNESS, IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS, and VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED.
Sadly, most horror films these days don't take the time to build up the atmosphere and setpieces of their stories, preferring to jump headlong into the scares. Quite honestly, that to me is like sex without foreplay, which is far less satisfying. IT FOLLOWS trumps most of its current brethren because it is more similar to the Horror Classics of the 60s, 70s, and 80s, which knew that what you cannot see and what you are anticipating is far more terrifying that what you actually finally see. And that is more satisfying.
Also adding to IT FOLLOWS' retro feel are the characters. Mitchell never states explicitly what era the story is unfolding in, but his characters don't quite feel like 2015 kids. There are no cell phones ever used, and the only electronic device is the handheld video game that Yera constantly plays - and even that looks somewhat old-fashioned. There also seems to be an innocence to the characters that is more in line with Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her girlfriends from HALLOWEEN in 1978, and less of the knowingly post-modern sensibilities that characterize post-SCREAM horror films. It helps considerably that the cast is composed of talented unknowns, which makes it much easier for the audience to walk in their character's shoes. Imagine if Jay and her pals were played by Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens, and Taylor Swift. IT FOLLOWS would've been considerably less effective because we would see the "stars" and not the humans they are playing.
Also, special credit must go to IT FOLLOWS' eerie synthesizer score which also pays homage not only to similar scores from 70's and 80's classics like THE EXORCIST, HALLOWEEN, THE BOOGEYMAN, and THE FOG, but also to the Italian Gialli that influenced those films. The band Disasterpeace handled the musical duties for IT FOLLOWS and they have created brilliantly unnerving music that joins the classics of yesteryear..
Like HALLOWEEN before it, IT FOLLOWS ends on a creepily ambiguous note. There is talk of a sequel. Given this film's commercial and critical success, that is welcome news. Let's hope that David Robert Mitchell will continue at the helm with his minimalist indie approach - and not go the big-budget Hollywood route.
PADDINGTON (2015 - FAMILY / ADVENTURE) ***1/2 out of ***** or 7 out of 10 (Talk about marmalade overload...)
CAST: Hugh Bonneville, Sally Hawkins, Nicole Kidman, Peter Capaldi, Madeleine Harris, Samuel Joslin, Julie Walters, Jim Broadbent, Michael Gambone. DIRECTOR: Paul King (WARNING: Some SPOILERS and lots of examples of Country Bear abuse - straight ahead....
IT'S LIKE THIS: If there was ever an organization promoting the virtues of orange marmalade, they would cream their jeans over our next review. It's called PADDINGTON, and - yes - it's the first big-budget Hollywood adaptation of the beloved British children's book character: a talking bear who is sweet, cuddly, and has major jones for orange marmalade. And I mean MAJOR. By the way, if you also want to know the difference between the United Kingdom and the United States, all you have to do is look at the "Talking Bear" characters that each of them have unleashed on the world. The Brits, being cultured, mannered, tasteful people, gave us the aforementioned adorable and innocent Paddington who loves marmalade. We Americans, on the other hand, being, um, Americans, gave the world... TED. In case you forgot who that is, he was the horny, foul-mouthed, crazy-wild party animal from Boston who hung out with Mark Wahlberg and loves muff-diving whose sequel (called, uh, TED 2) also comes out this summer. Enough said. Anyhow, PADDINGTON gets started with the kindly London anthropologist Montgomery Clyde (Tim Downie), arriving in the deep jungles of Peru. There, he meets an equally-kindly family of talking bears whose trust he wins by offering them some.... good ol' British marmalade. And let's just say our talking bears take to that shit like a Hollywood boulevard junkie with Grade A meth. Unfortunately, Montgomery's visit must come to an end, so he bids adieu to our talking bear family - and tells them that he will always think of them. For their part, the talking bears assume that everyone from London is as nice as Montgomery. Silly, silly bears... Flash forward many years and one major Peruvian earthquake later, and the youngest member of the Talking Bear Clan finds himself on an impromptu pilgrimage to London, England (dispatched by his grandparents) to find Mr. Clyde. And that's when he finds out first-hand that not all Londoners are as kind and gracious as Montgomery Clyde. Fortunately, though, some of them actually are: our bear hero finds himself adopted by the Brown family when they find him wandering lost at Paddington station. This leads to our bear hero being christened as... Paddington. But let's backtrack a beat and meet the Brown family. They are comprised of: (1) Henry (Hugh Bonneville), cranky papa; (2) Mary (Sally), sweet mama; (3) Judy (Madeleine Brown), whiny daughter; and (4) Jonathan (Samuel Joslin), dorky son. Unfortunately, someone else in London gets wind of the talking bear walking its streets. She is Millicent Clyde (Nicole Kidman), the curator of the British museum whose great hobby is... stuffing things. By the way, if you're one the sharper knives in the drawer, you will notice Millicent's surname is similar to Montgomery and assume the two are related. How correct you are. Sadly, whereas Montgomery was kind and gracious, Millicent is ruthless and villainous. You see, Montgomery was Millicent's grandfather and when he got back from Peru he regaled her with stories of "Talking Bears." Ever since then, Millicent has been obsessed with bagging and tagging one. And now, it would seem her time has come. Ruh-roh, Shaggy. Er, Paddy. So... will the Brown family be able to protect Paddington from the maniacal Millicent? Or will they get mowed over in the process? Will Millicent finally get the trophy she has been looking for all these years? Who can save Paddington? Sounds like a job for Paddy's American cousin... Ted. Watch out, England... BUT SERIOUSLY: While there have been many animated TV iterations of the much-beloved British cartoon character Paddington, this is the first Hollywood big-screen live-action interpretation. As these things go, it's pretty solid. Much of that credit must go to its stellar cast and their talents, particularly Ben Whishaw's charming voicing of Paddington. Just like the movie version of GARFIELD from 2004 which divided audiences, PADDINGTON's success depended on how effectively its lead character was brought to life. Just as Bill Murray's voice perfectly captured the wickedly funny fat cat Garfield's personality, so too does Whishaw convey Paddington's sweet and naive personality. Kudos also goes to the rest of the cast. Sally Hawkins, Hugh Bonneville, Madeleine Harris, and Samuel Joslin all nail their roles as the various members of the Brown family that takes in Paddington. Bonneville is especially good as Henry, the father who starts out suspicious of Paddington but gradually comes to accept him. The gradual melting of Henry's formidable facade is made compelling by Bonneville, and is a treat to watch. As for the villains, the obligatory "assistant baddie" Mr. Curry is vividly played by Peter Capaldi. But the real standout is the main baddie herself, Millicent Clyde as wonderfully essayed by the talented Nicole Kidman. Kidman has always been a favorite of mine, with her ability to be an emotional chameleon. She can appear frosty and distant in one role, but then be very open and accessible in another - and be convincing in each. The fact is, I met Nicole Kidman years ago when she was still married to Tom Cruise - and they were the sweetest, most down-to-Earth couple. Very kind and unaffected, which is pretty rare for people of their stature. In interviews, Kidman similarly comes across as real and accessible, despite her statuesquely perfect beauty and fame. Which is why when she plays formidable "ice princesses" in movies like MALICE, TO DIE FOR, THE OTHERS, and here, it's remarkable because of how convincing she is. The plus in PADDINGTON is that it allows Kidman to leaven Millicent's intimidating air with some humor. I would love to see Kidman do more comedies and family-oriented films. It would surely tap into her naturally sweet disposition. All in all, PADDINGTON is a good example of big-budget Hollywood version of a beloved cartoon character. One that the entire family should enjoy, without having to know the history of Paddington the bear.
