(I suppose if you're going to have to travel 3,000 miles for some ass, it might as well belong to Nicolette Sheridan. Or Russell Crowe.)
CAST: John Cusack, Daphne Zuniga, Anthony Edwards, Boyd Gaines, Tim Robbins, Lisa Jane Persky, Viveca Lindfors, Nicolette Sheridan.
DIRECTOR: Rob Reiner
WARNING: Some SPOILERS and easily-melted ice princesses - straight ahead...
In between directing 80's classics like STAND BY ME and WHEN HARRY MET SALLY, Rob Reiner created this not-quite-classic road trip comedy that is still pretty decent. Purportedly a "re-imagining" of the 1934 Clark Gable-Claudette Colbert comedy gem, IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT, Reiner's THE SURE THING is told from a younger perspective. Not having seen IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT, I can't really compare this flick with it. Taken on its own, though, THE SURE THING is still a solid cinematic experience.
Our hero is Gib (John Cusack), one of those guys whose brains sometimes works against their looks. That is, Gib is as good-looking as, ahem, John Cusack - which means he does reasonably well with attracting girls. Unfortunately, he's smarter than your average hunk - and goes around spouting techno-babble about deep space when coming on to chicks. As you can imagine, this tactic is a bust. These gals are not interested in fucking a Carl Sagan-wannabe. Not even close.
So, all that by way of saying that Gib's high school life was pretty barren. He hopes to change that by going to college in New England, while his best pal, Lance (Anthony Edwards), goes to UCLA. Allow me to say this about Lance: if there was a Gold Medal for behaving like a Party Animal Horndog, he would win instantly. Suffice it to say, it's a wonder that Gib and Lance got along in high school. I guess opposites do attract.
Anyhow, Lance tells Gib that he should move to UCLA with him, because New England girls are (this is the movie talking, ladies of New England, not me) boring as shit . According to Lance, Cali is where the quality poon tang is at. Somehow, I get the feeling someone should inform him not to confuse quality with the other "q" word that also means "amount."
Gib, however, is deadset on going to school in New England. Not long after his arrival, though, he finds Lance's predictions to be partly-true: while the chicks are not exactly boring, none of them are exactly beating a path to his door. Especially Allison Bradbury (Daphne Zuniga), his classmate in English Composition 101. She'd sooner give him the stinkeye or curl her lip at him in disgust.
Allison is one of those chicks who is really uptight and could use a serious G-spot spanking to loosen her up. We know this because: (1) her English Comp professor (Viveca Lindfors) says her writing is competent but drier than the Sahara; (2) she schedules exact times to take showers, make phone calls, and scratch her nose; (3) she has a boyfriend at UCLA who sounds even more boring than her; and (4) as mentioned before, she'd sooner see Gib get hit by a crashing meteor than acknowledge his presence.
Why does Allison hate him so much? Well, see, Gib asked her to tutor him in English Comp. After several decades of trying to convince her, Allison finally accepted. For a while there, it looked like Allison and Gib might actually have a relationship which revolves around things other than vicious insults and icy glares. Then Gib, being Gib, took her onto the roof and pulled his "let-me-get-into-your-pants-by-talking-about-the-Crab-Nebula" routine. Which resulted in a swift kick to his mid-section. Suffice it to say, don't expect to see Gib and Allison huddled at the Student Union over hot chocolate anytime soon.
Fortunately, Gib doesn't have to mope for too long, because who should contact him right at the start of Christmas break but Lance the Horndog, himself? Seems our transplanted California boy wants his buddy Gib to hightail it out to L.A. to meet... a "sure thing." This "sure thing" is: (1) blonde, (2) gorgeous, (3) tanned, and (4) looks a lot like Nicollette Sheridan. Not surprisingly, Gib forgets all about Allison and quickly arranges to hitch a ride with a couple driving to the West Coast. Nothing like the promise of a slammin' orgasm to get a guy motivated again.
It will come as no surprise that when the couple pick up Gib, he discovers that they have offered the fourth seat to... Allison Bradbury. Yup. Seems Gib's pilgrimage to the Temple of Pussy isn't going to be a smooth one. It's bad enough that Gary and Mary Beth (Tim Robbins and Lisa Jane Persky), the couple driving, are complete and utter loons given to singing Showtunes like a demented Sonny and Cher. Now, Gib has to ride shotgun for the Queen of the Biyatches, as well.
As you can imagine, cooping up two people who get along like a starving doberman and a bleeding squirrel is about as brilliant an idea as cooping up a, well, starving doberman with a bleeding squirrel. Soon enough, the bickering between Gib and Allison explodes into an act of impromptu indecent exposure (on - gasp! - Allison's part) that has to be seen to be believed. This, in turn, results in Gary getting cited by a traffic cop. Which, in turn, leads the enraged Gary to throw Gib and Allison out onto their petulant asses - and driving off without them. Leaving them behind. In the middle of nowhere.
How now, brown cows? How will Gib get to his appointment with "The Sure Thing?" How will Allison meet up with her boring-ass fiancee? Will they both die on the road to California? Or will some poor, unsuspecting soul give them a lift? Are they going to have to be resourceful and work together to make it to the West Coast in time? What adventures await them? And will Gib actually close the deal with his "Sure Thing?" Or is Lance playing an elaborate prank on Gib by foisting a transvestite on him?
Put it this way: anything goes in Los Angeles. Draw your own conclusions.
BUT, SERIOUSLY: As I wrote in the intro, I haven't seen IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT (although an acquaintance recently raved about how "ageless" it was) and therefore cannot assess how THE SURE THING stacks up against it. Judged as a stand-alone movie, though, it more than passes the bar - giving us a good 90 minutes or so of pleasant and funny entertainment.
The plot isn't exactly serpentine, and the conclusion is pretty much foregone. The appeal of THE SURE THING lies in its characters - who are vivid and fleshed out enough to keep us interested. You could argue that these are essentially archetypes (the quirky goofball, the aloof ice princess, the horndog best friend, the mysterious sex object, etc.), but they are all given just enough nuance to avoid any easy pigeon-holing.
John Cusack plays Gib as a guy who is confident in and comfortable with his own "other-ness" - but still has some growing up to do. His experiences with Allison provide the impetus for this maturation. Speaking of Allison, Daphne Zuniga is quite winning as the kind of girl who covers up insecurity and lack of experience with cool aloofness and strict adherence to order. Yet, you also sense that she also has a hunger for adventure that has been stifled for too long. Watching Gib slowly disarm her during their cross-country odyssey is what lifts THE SURE THING above the sea of college flicks.
In his supporting role of Best Friend, Anthony Edwards is a hoot - and looks great with a full head of hair. He's still a good-looking guy even now with most of it gone, but it's nice to see how he looked back then. Nicollette Sheridan isn't really given much to do but pose and look desirable, but she manages to give her "sex object" role enough definition so that she doesn't blend into the backdrop. Tim Robbins (in an early role) and Lisa Jane Persky are amusing as the kind of people you wouldn't want to go on a road trip with.
All in all, THE SURE THING is solid comedy and Road Trip flick that can stand proudly next to the other films in Rob Reiner's remarkable canon. It may not be a classic, but it's good enough to be an also-ran.
Next on my agenda is to watch IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT - as soon as possible.
