WILLOW CREEK (2014 - HORROR / MONSTER / FOUND FOOTAGE MOVIE) ***1/2 out of ***** OR 7 out of 10
(Yep. I'm staying in the city...)
CAST: Bryce Johnson, Alexie Gilmore, Peter Jason, Bucky Sinister, Laura Montagna, Shaun White Guy Sr., Timmy Red, Nita Rowley, Steven Streufert.
DIRECTOR: Bobcat Goldthwait
(WARNING: Some SPOILERS and very sensible reasons to leave woodland critters of all shapes and sizes the hell alone - straight ahead...)
IT'S LIKE THIS: Man, the trouble horror movie characters could save themselves if they would just, you know, watch some goddamned horror movies. Case in point: the lead couple of our next "31 DAYS OF HALLOWEEN" review, Jim and Kelly (Bryce Johnson, Alexie Gilmore). Jim is your basic sexy nerd, kind of like Andrew Garfield but with blonde hair, while Kelly is beautiful in haughty, aristocratic way (think a young Sigourney Weaver). Not only are they fairly cute, they also seem pretty funny, given how they talk to each other. In other words, this is a couple that I could have a beer with. Or a threesome. They're cool, man.
They're just not very smart. I mean, why-oh-fucking-why do they decide to traipse deep into the Northern California redwoods without a map or a compass or a GPS or a sat phone - and nothing but their rucksacks and movie camera? Well, it's my sad duty to inform you that our cutie-pie couple are trying to catch a glimpse of the elusive... Bigfoot. Yes, folks: Sas-fucking-quatch. Apparently, these dorks haven't seen THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT (review # 562) like the rest of the world; otherwise, they'd reconsider their plans and just go back to San Francisco and do something more productive like tongue each other under the Bay Bridge or something. Not that I would know anything about that. And anyone who says I do... might be right.
But I digress. Anyway, our cute-but-not-exactly-the-brightest-bulbs-on-the-Christmas-tree couple plan to interview locals in the town of Willow Creek, CA, which is apparently some sort of "Bigfoot Mecca." Yep. You want Bigfoot - this place has him in spades. Bigfoot statues. Bigfoot T-shirts. Bigfoot stickers. Even a "Bigfoot Burger" that would give pause even to a bottomless pit like me who's use to shoving huge things in his mouth. Wait... that came out wrong somehow...
Whatever. The point is Jim is on Cloud Nueve, he's so happy. Evidently, he's a huge Bigfoot Nerd and it's been his dream since even before his balls dropped to visit Willow Creek - as well as the site deep in the nearby woods where the famed "Patterson-Gimlin Footage" was shot. Remember those grainy, blurry film reels showing what looked like giant furry brown turd running along a river and into the woods that is widely-said to be the only known footage of Bigfoot? Well, a couple of real-life yokels named Patterson and Gimlin shot it near Willow Creek back in 1968 or something. Of course, I won't even go into the equally widely-held notion that the whole thing was just an elaborate hoax. Jim is adorable and I don't want to burst his bubble. Neither does Kelly, apparently.
Even when some of the locals warn Jim and Kelly that the Bigfoot legend is not to be trifled with, they still press ahead with their plans to find the place where Patterson and Gimlin shot his footage. I guess Jim is hoping for a repeat performance from Sasquatch. Ahem. He's so determined to realize his childhood dream that even when a creepy dude played by someone named Bucky Sinister explicitly tells them to forget their plans and go back to the city, they just laugh in his face. Well, quite honestly, if someone named "Bucky Sinister" approached me and warned me against doing something, I would probably laugh in his face, too. I mean, you can't really take someone seriously when they have a name that sounds like it belongs to psychotic porn star.
At any rate, Jim and Kelly eventually leave Willow Creek and all the naysaying locals behind and venture deep into the Northern California redwoods. They are given one last chance to get the hell out of dodge by a scary redneck (Steven Streufert) who makes Bucky Sinister look like Buzz Lightyear - and Jim seemingly finally sees the light and decides to turn around. Oh, wait, nope... there goes Jim driving down another logging road to secretly circle around Scary Redneck. Yup, like I said: cute but not long to this Earth. I should also add that Kelly basically does a fist pump in support of her man's craftiness in outwitting that redneck who, while freaky as fuck, just might have had a valid reason to keep them from going deeper in them thar woods.
Eventually, Jim and Kelly reach the end of the logging road and begin their trek deep in them thar woods to find the Patterson-Gimlin site. Soon, we are treated to a nice shot of Jim's fine ass while he skinny-dips gleefully in a mountain pool, while Kelly watches on, clearly congratulating herself on her excellent choice in Boy Toys. Their buzz doesn't last long, though, because as soon as they return to their campsite, Jim discovers that someone - or something - has trashed their tent and hung some of his clothes up in some high tree branches.
Ooooooooo-weeeeeeeeee-ooooooooooo!
Sure enough, later that night after Jim proposes to Kelly (don't even ask how that turned out), they are awakened abruptly in their tent - and start hearing strange whooooping noises in the distance, as well as some eerie knocking sounds that seem to be getting closer and closer. Jim tells Kelly that the whoooooooping sounds are "vocalizations" that Bigfoots, er, Bigfeet, er, Sasquatches use to communicate with one another. So are the knocking sounds that are likely stones or branches being knocked together. At which point, Kelly just basically glares at him and is all like, "This is not the kind of shit I need to be hearing from you right now." Or something like that.
Ooooooooooo-weeeeeeeee-oooooooooo!
So... have Jim and Kelly found Bigfoot? What is making all those whoooooping noises and knocking sounds? Is it a Sasquatch? Or something else? Why were Bucky Sinister, Scary Redneck, and all the other locals trying to scare them off? And what happens the next day when Jim and Kelly decide they've had enough and try to hike back to their car - but can't find it? Will they find their way back before it gets dark again? Will they ever get back to the city where they should've stayed in the first place? Why-oh-why didn't these cute-but-dense chuckleheads plan better?
Have fun with them, Sasquatch. They're all yours.
BUT SERIOUSLY: In our recent reviews for THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT (review # 562) and PARANORMAL ACTIVITY (review # 578), we discussed how the former may have started the Found Footage Sub-Genre, but the latter is the one that set the bar for sheer Scare Factor. THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT also benefited from a sleight-of-hand marketing that was borderline-dishonest, despite being a fairly average film. PARANORMAL ACTIVITY, on the other hand, was genuinely scary and truly earned its success.
In between those two films, quality-wise, is our latest "31 DAYS OF HALLOWEEN" review, director (and former actor) Bobcat Goldthwait's WILLOW CREEK. Plot-wise, this film is closer to THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT in its tale of two people trekking deep into the wilderness to investigate and document an rural legend. Execution-wise, though, it's more similar to PARANORMAL ACTIVITY in that it is an engaging, entertaining, and - eventually - quite scary film. The terror in WILLOW CREEK occurs mainly in the last part of the movie, but because we have been anticipating it throughout the first two acts, it's all the more effective when it is finally unleashed.
Jim and Kelly are very likably and believably played by Bryce Johnson and Alexie Gilmore. The rapport that Johnson and Gilmore give this couple is instrumental in keeping us hooked throughout the first two acts that follow them as they explore the town of Willow Creek and its inhabitants. Johnson, in particular, is so good as the eager, child-like Jim that we easily understand why he could be over-optimistic in his ability to hike the woods without a compass or a map. Gilmore also makes Kelly so believably supportive of Jim that she wouldn't question him too much. These long sequences where nothing "scary" happens, and we just get to know Jim and Kelly, could've been the kiss of death if Goldthwait had cast leads who didn't click with each other and the audience. Fortunately, Johnson and Gilmore are so amiable that we often forget we are watching a horror film. And when the plot kicks off the terror mechanics in the third act, we genuinely care what happens to them. You couldn't really say that about the kids in THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT.
The central setpiece of WILLOW CREEK is a bravura extended sequence in Jim and Kelly's tent where they film themselves listening to the mysterious sounds outside their tent that come and go, rise and fade, and eventually get uncomfortably close. This long, unbroken take goes on for nearly twenty minutes and charts Jim and Kelly's growing terror as they listen to a variety of chilling sounds that signal they have definitely bitten off more than they can chew - and are now in over their heads. This very same kind of scene exists in THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT, but it was fumbled royally in that movie, with the actors over-reacting to sounds we could barely make out. In WILLOW CREEK, Goldthwait and his leads do it right: each time we hear a sound, we register it exactly the same way Jim and Kelly do. Essentially, we feel their fear. I dare you to watch this sequence on a bigscreen TV at home with the lights all out and the sound cranked up. It is a triumph of terrifying sound design and the power of suggestion, reminding us that the unseen and unknown is far more frightening than anything we could ever see.
WILLOW CREEK, ultimately, may revisit the well-worn path of THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT, but it does it well. It is a much better film because of more engaging, sympathetic leads and a director who, despite his comedy past as an director/actor, apparently knows how to scare you. It may not be quite as effective as PARANORMAL ACTIVITY, but WILLOW CREEK is still one of the better Found Footage Flicks to come out in awhile.
