(Schmucks have feelings, too. Unlike shallow, materialistic bastards)
CAST: Steve Carrell, Paul Rudd, Jemaine Clement, Stephanie Szostak, David Walliams, Bruce Greenwood, Kristen Schaal, Lucy Punch.
DIRECTOR: Jay Roach.
WARNING: Some SPOILERS and douchebags vs. schmucks showdowns right ahead...
I have to admit that when Steve Carrell first started to garner attention as the Boss-Not-From-Hell-But-Someplace-Weirder from THE OFFICE, I couldn’t figure out what was supposed to be so hilarious about him. I mean, he was funny enough in the clips I saw online, but I can’t say I saw anything that warranted the frenzy. Then I saw THE 40-YEAR OLD VIRGIN - and subsequently saw the light. The guy is hilarious. Hilarious in a “FUCK IT!!! I’M DIVING INTO THE DEEP END AND I DON‘T CARE IF YOU LAUGH!!!” way. Which, most of the time, does make you laugh. And he also knows how to underplay effectively to sell his character’s humanity, which is not an easy trick for a comedian to do.
As for Paul Rudd, well, let’s just say that I’ve been a fan ever since he bickered with Alicia Silverstone in CLUELESS approximately 58 years ago. Not as blatantly funny as Steve Carrell, Paul Rudd is more of a slow-burn comedian - who makes his droll inexpressiveness almost... expressive. These guys co-starred in the aforementioned 40-YEAR OLD VIRGIN where Carrell was the virgin, and Rudd one of his decidedly un-virginal buddies. But in today’s review, DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS, they share equal footing - and it’s great a pairing.
Paul Rudd plays Tim, a financial analyst for a securities firm who dreams of moving up the corporate ladder - literally. See, Tim works on the 6th Floor which, according to his goofy assistant Susan (Kristen Schaal), reeks of cabbage. So much so that the guys who hit on her at clubs comment on her Eau De ColeSlaw - which, fortunately, somehow never gets in the way of her getting laid. Or so she claims.
Anyhow, Tim would like to rise from the land of leafy vegetables to the rarified air on the 7th Floor, where the Executive Team of the company engage in the following activities: (1) practicing their golf-swings, (2) cracking jokes about the sixth floor denizens, and (3) comparing the fellating skills of their hooker girlfriends. This, apparently, is attractive to Tim. Of course, this type of aspiration is thoroughly in line with someone who has an apartment, car, and girlfriend that are waaaaaaaaaay above his pay grade, so to speak. In other words, Tim is not exactly a careerist douche bag - but close to it.
Basically, Tim needs a promotion to be able to sustain his First Class living and chi-chi paramour Julie (Stephanie Szostak), because Heaven forbid he actually tries to live within his means and, I don't know, get a girlfriend who’s a little more low-maintenance than Julie, whose highlights and hairstyle alone look like they were financed by the GNP of a developing nation. At any rate, after one of his presentations on the 7th floor leads to an offer by CEO/Head Douchebag Lance Fender (Bruce Greenwood) to take over the position of a recently-fired exec, things begin to look up for our profligate corporate climber.
There’s one catch, however: Lance wants to evaluate Tim’s suitability for an office on the hallowed 7th floor. If you think this means a review of his past five performance reports, a background check, a written test, or some sort of interview - allow me to disappoint you. Nope, our boss Lance doesn’t confine himself to such conventional ways of employee assesment.
No, sir... His idea of determining whether or not someone is executive material is to invite the candidate to his palatial manse for dinner - with one caveat: the candidate needs to bring - well, there is just no way say this gracefully, is there? - a total loser. In fact, all the invitees need to bring one loser each. And for the rest of the evening, Lance and his posse make fun of their guests and basically try to see who the Biggest Loser is. And by that title, I don’t mean who drops the most pounds during the course of the meal. This, evidently, is the crowd that Tim longs to be a part of. If it’s occurring to you right now that Tim himself might be the winner of the Biggest Loser title because of his materialistic ways - and what he’s willing to do to sustain them - then aren’t you the sharp one?
Unfortunately, the script is more interested in laughs than subtext. And in order for it to be funny, Tim needs to meet a schmuck - and fast. The script obliges and has his Porsche run over Barry (Steve Carrell), a taxidermist trying to pick up a dead mouse in the middle of the street. We know that Barry is, well, odd because he practically rolls over the top of Tim’s Porsche, but doesn’t: (1) cuss Tim out, (2) demand his insurance info, or (3) threaten to sue him within an inch of his life. Nope, Barry just grins like the benign doofus that he is and basically strikes up a friendship with Tim. Now, if only there were more people like that, this world would be a... strange place.
At any rate, Tim gradually realizes that he just might have the guest he needs to bring to Lance’s dinner. Fortunately, Julie demonstrates commendable depth for a bimbo by insisting that Tim not attend the function because it would be “messed up.” Hard to say if she means making fun of the losers, or having to eat surrounded by so many of them. But we’ll give her the benefit of the doubt because she's sizzlin’ hot, eh?
Tim, however, really wants to be able to continue to live beyond his means and doesn’t cut Barry loose like he should. Instead, he pretty much lets Barry hang around him, leading Barry to: (1) invite Tim’s psycho one-night-stand from three years ago, Darla (Lucy Punch), to Tim’s crib; (2) alienate Julie from Tim (big loss) and drive her into the arms of Kieran (Jemaine Clement), an artist who looks like the lovechild of Cro-Magnon Man and Cousin It; and (3) basically destroy the important brunch between Tim and Mueller (David Walliams), a major Swiss client who looks eerily like a wax mannequin with blue marbles for eyes. And don’t get me started about how Mueller’s wife looks.
So, basically, Tim finds himself in a quandary: does he push through with this abhorrent social event that will grant him access to the upper-echelons of corporate-douchebagery - or does he, you know, listen to his heart and... well, hmmmmm, I guess his heart really wants that corner office on 7, right? Hmmmmm. A dilemma....
But just when you think that Tim will go the “heartless prick” route, he surprises us (or, at least, the two people in the audience who don’t know crap about a “character arc”) by deciding he can’t go through with this. He hightails it down to Lance’s crib (if you can call something that looks like Buckingham Palace on Steroids a crib) to tell his boss that he can’t go through with the dinner. Unfortunately, having heard about the event beforehand, Barry is already there - and guffawing at the collection of Grade A Schmucks that Tim’s colleagues have scrounged up. To wit, I present: (1) a scrawny dude who’s apparently married to a condor - and pretty much French Kisses the ugly bird at the dinner table (or maybe he was feeding it with his mouth - either way, it’s fucking gross), and (2) a goofy blind man who won’t shut the fuck up, and (3) a crazy bitch who communicates with dead pets and won't shut the fuck up. Suffice it to say, Barry is justified in saying that these bizarros actually make him look like the paragon of normalcy.
That is, until he whips out his “History of Civilization” presentation - as told through the eyes (and stiff bodies) of dead mice. Right around then is when Barry’s cool points kind of take a swan dive.
Anyhow, this extended dinner sequence serves as the third act and climax of the film - and is best left unspoiled since the funniest bits are in this section. Suffice it to say, the following occur: (1) Barry’s wacky boss, Therman (Zach Galifanakis), shows up to spice things up, (2) all hilarity breaks loose, and (3) Lance and his pack of douchebags learn that they picked the wrong Schmucks to ridicule. Big time. Very big time.
BUT, SERIOUSLY: Paul Rudd and Steve Carrell are the main reasons to see this film. Like some sort of throwback to THE ODD COUPLE, these guys play well off each other with their differences. Barry actually courts more audience sympathy than Tim at the outset, given that the latter has been portrayed as a posturing materialist. But, as usual, Paul Rudd wins you over by uncovering the decency in Tim that’s been obscured by ambition. And as for Barry... Barry is actually not all that weird - at least he’s stuffing mice and not, well, lost tourists or back-packing teenagers or something. Or maybe it’s just Carrell’s innate likability shining through. Either way, both these guys nail their roles.
The rest of the cast rise to the occasion: Zach Galifanakis is hilarious as Carrell’s boss/rival. Ron Livingston is appropriately slimy as Tim’s own rival. Stephanie Szostak is decent as Tim’s girlfriend - and has what has to be the Sexiest Overbite ever. Lucy Punch is a loony delight as Tim’s psycho stalker. The scene where Darla and Barry square off in Tim’s apartment and end up demolishing part of it is classic. Finally, Jemaine Clement as Tim’s rival to Julie’s affections is bizarrely compelling and memorable.
In the end, though, DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS falls a little short of **** or higher because of the length of time it takes to get to the dinner. Yes, it was necessary to set up the characters, but it didn’t have to be drawn out. Imagine if 80% of the film had been at the dinner - what a treat that would’ve been. Still, this is funny stuff.
