MOVIE RATING SCALE:

***** (Spectacular) 10

****1/2 (Excellent) 9

**** (Very Good) 8

***1/2 (Good) 7

*** (Above Average) 6

**1/2 (Average) 5

** (Below Average) 4

*1/2 (Mediocre) 3

* (Awful) 2

1/2 (Abysmal) 1

0 (Worthless) 0


Saturday, May 21, 2011

REVIEW UPDATE: Sounders beat the Sporting Kansas In A Game of True Suspense....

Now, this is why they call it "the Beautiful Game", folks...

The whole thing could've been a thriller movie. And its title would've been THE DEFENDERS ATTACK! Tonight's game between the Sounders and Sporting Kansas was a ferocious, nail-biting nil-nil up until the end of the second quarter. Then, right in the middle of stoppage time, when a 0-0 seemed all but certain, with everyone gathering up their jackets and getting ready to make a disappointed sprint for the Light Rail or the parking lot, our boys in green scored a surprise last-minute goal from a corner kick/header combo courtesy of defenders Tyson Wahl and Jeff Parke.

Jeff Parke's header sent the ball into the net, which Kansas' goalie missed by a mile. Dude wound up getting tangled in the net worse than the ball. If I wasn't screaming and jumping up and down like the whole stadium, I would've been laughing my ass off. Dude was ass over teakettle in the net like a huge albino fish.

And let's not forget Kasey Keller's numerous saves, involving one breathtaking sweep/slide in which he literally stole the ball from under the feet of an attacking Kansas player. The move was such a thing of beauty I literally cried with joy. The man is a truly a keeper - in more ways than one...

Love it. Love it. Love it. Now I don't have to make a bootie call to work out my frustration like I did last weekend with the Sounder vs. Timbers draw... Well, maybe I'll make the call anyway - to celebrate. > )

Is that the Kansas City Goalie - or the fucking bad guy from THE DAVINCI CODE?

Jeff Parke, you're my hero...

The Beautiful Game...

Next up: Dallas FC on Wednesday night. Watch out, you Texan bastards...